Sunday, February 7, 2010

Professional vs. Personal - Ugh, the guilt!!!

I was going to visit Mom tonight after my radio shift and spend the night, staying with her until Tuesday. I haven't seen her in over a week, and I feel like if I don't physically see her, I don't truly know if she's okay. I worry about her health; I worry if she's lonely. She's been recovering from hip replacement surgery, and she has had a long, difficult, challenging recovery. My mom had the surgery late November of 2009, and my siblings and I have worked hard to help her through this process. In my efforts to take care of her, for which I have NO regrets; and feeling in a bit of slump as well, I admittedly somewhat neglected my own life.

I received a call from my boss at the station stating that he would like me to interview, Aventura, the extremely famous Dominican quartet from the Bronx, who recently sold out Madison Square Garden. Duh - of course I said YES!! It is going to be awesome! The interview is set for this Tuesday. Anyone who understands who Aventura is knows I'd be an idiot not to do this; what a FANTASTIC opportunity this is- to interview the hottest latin group, and to prove that I can conduct a great interview. So I began doing research, and read about them, listened to their songs, read the reviews and articles, etc. And as I began to run my agenda through my brain, I realized that I really need to be close by. I have the interview to do, videos to record this week, more work on my website, and my manager's voice kept echoing in my mind: "Judy, this is your one is going to make this happen but you."

So I called mom. "Mom..." I told her about the interview. "Would you mind if I don't come over tonight? I have so many things to do, and I just don't want to be unprepared, or feel rushed." With total empathy, my mom said, "Sure! Not a problem at all." And although I felt she was sincere, that she didn't mind, it still bothered me after we hung up. When I got to the station, I called her again. "Are you sure, Mom?" Mom said what she always says, "Mami, I love you....go do what you gotta do...go kick butt!"

I believe you can only be truly happy when all the elements of life are in balance: personal, professional, spiritual, physical, social, etc. All these parts of life need attention...but it makes it no easier. I'm home now...had dinner, did some work. But I just wish I could be here and there with Mom. I have always felt an over-developed sense of responsibility to my family, especially Mom. Some of these feelings are healthy and maybe some of them are not. But one thing remains true: I love my mommy! LOL. And when I make it real big, I can help her in ways we could not have imagined! So, back to work. Love you, Mom! Muah!


  1. Hi Judy:

    I understand how your feel about taking care of your family and yourself. The one thing that I've come to grips with is that, you must take care of yourself first, then support your family.

    Its very hard to do it in that order when you have a giving spirit. When someone needs you, you"ll drop everything to aid them, but when the smoke clears, you left all alone.

    Your doing a great job, so don't let your mind overtake you. As long as you know you're taking steps everyday to accomplish your goals, then your ok.

    Keep up the good work.

    Byron Burke
    House Music Channel

  2. awh!!! the bright side is that you're NOT forgetting about her. I guess you have to make sure that your siblings are doing their part to make sure your mom is ok. Sometimes you just gotta delegate the work.

    Good luck on the interview! I just recently heard about this group and the MSG gig where Marc Anthony showed up. I havent heard their music yet. I'm sure I wont be able to escape it much longer. It sounds like these guys are blowing up!

  3. My dearest Judy,

    I understand your feelings. The important part is that you have your siblings tha play apart in caring for her as well and you are not alone. Truth of the matter is you MUST take care of YOU FIRST! I know you love your mom, but I am quite sure she wants the best for you also and wants to see you happy. With that said, I hope you have a wonderful interview and enjoy it while you're at it! I am so happy for you and must say that I am PROUD TO KNOW YOU!

    Tale care my dear.
    Love yah