Take a Breath And Hold Your Reaction

Took Mom to physical therapy today, as she's been recovering from hip replacement surgery. She has had a long and tough road to healing, but I'm so proud of her and her effort to be well.  My nieces were as beautiful as always.  I bought the movie "I Can Do Bad All By Myself" and cried like an actress doing a Kleenex commercial.  The movie moves me, inspires me, and makes me want to go back to church.  Truth is I love church.  I really do!  I love community, gospel music, singing and clapping, praying and feeling good!  I just sometimes disagree with a lot of things that it teaches sometimes, and feel torn between feeling like a hyprocritical sinner and being brave enough to think that it is possible to love ALL people even if they believe diffrently than me.

I hate to admit it, but Mr. Mak keeps haunting my brain.  It sucks and I want to be all tough about it, and say, well, he let me down, but he's there.  There's a connection there...and it's beyond a physical attraction.  Can't explain it too well.  We've had such great conversations, and I think he has the perfect combination of intelligence and humility; manliness and empathy; dangerous and safe, lol...or maybe I'm just out of my mind!!!  Because here's the kicker...are you ready?  Take a breath and hold your reaction...here goes.

I've NEVER met him in person.  The story is long, and one day, maybe I will let you know the whole story.  Long story short we began as pen pals, graduated to texting, calling...but everytime we have a date planned something goes wrong either on his side or mine.  Just when I tried to get him out of my mind... 

Mr. Mak sent me a text...he had good news, and I was excited for him and congratulated him.  I had put my phone down while watching the movie and suddenly realized he'd been trying to contact me...damn!!

Did I mention??

I
MISS
CANDY!!

LOL..I can do this...but something's gotta give.  I need a date!!  Or a piece of candy!  Or date with candy in his hand...Sweet dreams!