Wednesday, June 9, 2010
Navy Guy News!
So, almost 3 weeks ago, Navy Guy called me. You know how a man's voice can just completely draw you right back to the first time you met him??? Well, that's what happened. I heard his voice.."Hey...Judy..." - that kind of masculine-testosterone-warm kind of voice...I almost melted a bit. Okay. So we begin to talk and I update him on how my life is going and how I cannot wait for my new song to come out, my sinus surgery, etc. Once we got through the typical stuff, he accused me of "kicking him to the curb"...I explained I had not done that; I simply protected myself before I got hurt. (Ladies, you know what I mean: I didn't want to wait for a man who didn't love me enough.)
"I didn't kick you to the curb."
"You kicked me to the curb & I didn't even do anything wrong to you. I was good to you."
"Um, helloooo! I was damned good to you too!! And I did I OT kick you to the curb...you said you didn't want a relationship. You said you didn't want me to wait for you...If you don't name it, you can't claim it."
"What the hell are you talking about? All I know is I always came to see you - I wasn't seeing anyone else, I kept drvivng 10-12 hours each way just to see you! What the hell do you mean?"
"Well, if you wanted me, you should've said something. If you want me to be your girl, you should've said something!"
Now the voices began to escalate...
"Are you serious? Judy, you don't think you were my girl? We went out for like 5 months! I drove back and forth, we went out, we had a great time...of course you were my girl."
LOL..."Well you never said anything, and you gave me the impression you thought I was some kind of "friend with benefits," and I'm not that at all.
"Man, you kicked me to the curb. I STILL can't believe it!"
"I did not!!! Ughh!"
"Judy, if you were in front of me right now, you know what I'd say?"
"I love you."
Did he just say what I think he said?
Okay, there it goes...yes, I'm breathing. Yes, I think he said it....
"Oh, so why didn't you say something before?"
"Did I HAVE to say something? I thought I SHOWED it!"
"Yes, of course you have to say something! I am a woman who wants to be shown love, but I have to hear it too!! I need both."
"Well, maybe I'm not that type of guy."
I know I was blushing.
"Well, I gotta go, Julie (He always called me Julie)."
"Hey, I'll call you soon, ok?"
I hung up...completely dumbfounded and speechless. And then, I cried a very quiet cry, the kind that only one tear falls, but it is more than enough. Wow. He told me he loves me....I hadn't heard a man tell me he loved me in almost 2 years! Felt good...I admit it. The questions remain for me: Did he say it because he meant it? Or did he say it because he's lonely? Did he have some sort of revelation & realize there was something solid there? Or Was he just tipsy?
So next day, when I asked him if he remembered saying he loved me (I suspected he may have been a bit tipsy when he'd called the night before), he suddenly cried amnesia. And that's my point!
Today, he sent me a photo of him, from the battleship I believe. All in uniform. Damn, he had to look good too?? He returns in July...wants to see me...wants to talk...wants to come to Beatstock, lol!! The photo made me smile...I don't know if it's that I'm very lonely, or if there really is something solid between us! I hate that feeling...I'll be 42 on Sunday. I really would like a life partner...someone to open my eyes to in the morning. Gotta admit, Navy Guy looked good, lol! Ah, men!!!